Here’s a little poem I wrote in December of 2012. It’s about my fathers suicide attempt back when I was a junior in high school. My father had taken all his medications and had fallen into an deep sleep like state on our couch, he was on top of his bible and prescription bottles. My mother and I had found him as she was about to give me a ride to school because I had missed the bus. We tried to wake him but couldn’t. Because I was running late for school and we could hear him snoring my mother took me to school with him still on the couch snoring loudly. I told her that if he was still like that when she got home to call 911 because he might have done something stupid. When she came home she found that he had fallen off the couch and onto the floor in between the couch and the coffee table revealing his bible and prescription bottles. She called 911 and texted me and my sister telling us what had happened. This was September 12th, Three days after my birthday. I wrote this a couple months later while sobbing uncontrollably.
My life filled with dread,
My dad lie still in a bed,
because of the voices in his head.
My eyes filled with tears,
As I said words to his ears,
Praying his end wasn’t near,
An angel must of appeared,
For he’s still fucking here.
But in my moments of fear,
I said to him there,
Again and again,
Without any end.
If you leave me now,
I’ll still love you somehow.